The Lonesome Electric Turkey Tapes (Part 2)

Frank Zappa - The Lonesome Electric Turkey Tapes Part 2

1. Intro Rap
2. You Are What You Is
3. Fine Girl
4. I'm So Cute
5. We Are Not Alone
6. Hot-Plate Heaven at the Green Hotel (Live Version)
7. Cosmik Debris
8. Camarillo Brillo
9. Would You Go All The Way?
10. The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing
11. Stick It Out
12. Punky's Whips (Live Version)
13. Dinah-Moe Hum
14. Tryin' To Grow A Chin
15. Tell Me You Love Me
16. Stinkfoot
17. The Torture Never Stops (Original Capt. Beefheart version)
18. WPLJ (White Pony Lemon Juice)
19. Going For The Money


I haven't done commentary for a mix in a while, but some of this requires it.

The first track is some of the behind-the-scenes dialogue in the movie "Baby Snakes", Terry Bozio pretending to be an awestruck fan trying out for the band. That's after a 10-minute acid-trip visual and before an hour-long concert film. Yes, FZ was a bizarre kinda guy.

"You Are What You Is" is one of the better "concept" albums FZ put out, ranking up there with "Thing-Fish" (which has an alternate version of this song) and "Joe's Garage." A scathing rebuke on racism, from both sides of the aisle and about people trading in their racial identity to fit in better. And it's funny, too.

"Fine Girl" , from "Tinseltown Rebellion" also appeared on the Greatest Hits compilation, "Strictly Commercial" - Ike Willis tells us what his idea of a "fine girl" is, which includes a head that's flat ("but her hair covers that") and being built like a mule.

From my favorite album "Sheik Yerbuti", comes "I'm So Cute" making fun of Terry Ted Bozio and his cute-boy looks, sung by the man himself. Terry, the song says, is "so cool, he'll make you freeze." Notable also for the scatting FZ does, imitating the main riff of the song.

Instrumentals make up a majority of the FZ catalog, but they don't often make good mixtape material. I have a few exceptions to this rule, which includes "We Are Not Alone", a boozy jazzy number from "The Man From Utopia." The sax alone rocks, but watch for the xylophone solo.

As I've said in numerous places, FZ's "Hot-Plate Heaven at the Green Hotel" is about as prescient a political track as you can get. 30+ years later, it still seems to apply. Sample lyric "Republicans is fine if you're a multi-millionaire, Democrats is fair all you own is what you wear. But neither of 'em's really right, cause neither of 'em care." This is the live version from the 1984 world tour, which ended up as the record "Does Humor Belong In Music?"

I've said before that the double-disc "Apostrophe"/"Overnite Sensation" was the first Zappa record I ever got and these next two songs are winners that come from that same set. "Cosmik Debris" has FZ taking spiritual gurus down a peg ("the price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down") and "Camarillo Brillo" remains one of his more bizarre hits, considering it's about a one-night stand with a lady who is quite nuts, has "green skin" and wears a poncho (much debate over whether it's a "real poncho or a Sears poncho").

The doo-wop period is often scoffed at by FZ hardcore fans, but I think it's some subversive hilarious goofiness. "Would You Go All The Way" flips the script on doo-wop's vague sexual innuendo ("would you go all the way for the USO, lift up your dress if the answer's no"). This version comes from "Chunga's Revenge".

As I said before, "You Are What You Is" takes many many potshots at many of FZ's favorite targets, including organized religion. "The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing" is a fine slice of sacrilege, part of a 3-song trio that includes "Heavenly Bank Account" and "Dumb All Over."

The next three songs are quite offensive, so if you've got tender sensibilities, you'd be wise to skip ahead. (If you've got tender sensibilities, how did you find yourself here?)

"Joe's Garage" takes a playful jab at Scientology, creating their own version called Appliantology, run by L. Ron Hoover, which includes having sex with household appliances. Here, the main character Joe is trying to seduce a robot called Sy Borg, by singing a filthy tirade in German. "Stick it Out" features Ike Willis singing lines like "stick out your curly weeny" and "don't get no jism on that sofa" in both German and English. Good for learning some of the finer points of German swearing.

Punky Meadows, for those who aren't aware, was a member of glam-metal darlings Angel. FZ made extensive jokes at the time about Punky's pouting face in a promo photo. Here, in a live version of "Punky's Whips", which was mostly improvised for the "Baby Snakes" concert film, Terry Bozio shares his love of Punky, insisting all the while that "I'm not gay." Keep an ear out for the jab at Jeff Beck, too.

Another hit that was very unusual for its content, "Dinah-Moe Hum" tells the story of FZ's attempt at getting a woman to orgasm. Yeah. From the album "Overnite Sensation"

Another genius piece from a longer-form record, "Lather" the song "Tryin' To Grow a Chin" seems self-explanatory, but I will only add that the solo is very reminiscent of "Hotel California"by the Eagles ...

This quick, punk-rock version of "Tell Me You Love Me" comes from the stellar live album series "You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore" - a fine cross-section of the musical playfulness that FZ's band could exude in their live show.

"Stinkfoot" is on here because I totally identify, my feets are stanky. And it's also another essential track from the "You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore" series. This live version is actually shorter than the album versions, which is the exact opposite of what usually happens.

I had to bury this next track later on, because it's 1.) very long and 2.) kinda monotonous. But it's a genius appearance by the master of bizarre, Captain Beefheart, and it deserves a place here. "The Torture Never Stops" (called "The Torcha Neva Stops" with re-tooled lyrics on "Thing-Fish") from the album"Zoot Allures" tells a bluesy tale of a prisoner and his terrible conditions in the "dungeon of despair" complete with Beefheart's grunt-y vocals. The twin harmonica/guitar solos are pretty stellar here. As are the sound effects, which, according the legend, were created using real people in real BDSM situations.

The really really fast version of "WPLJ" comes from "Does Humor Belong In Music?" and takes some of the lazy, haziness of the original version and condenses it down to its bare essence. The song is an ode to a drink, called White Port & Lemon Juice (guess what's in it), a drink referenced by several bands, most notably The Feathers, whose song "Johnny Darling" FZ had covered live.

We end with another goofy bit of dialogue, this from the movie "200 Motels".

I hope you enjoyed this week's Zappa tape. Look forward to more traditional tapes next week.

Download it here.